and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
