Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
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