sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize