Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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