why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
