oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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