can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
