Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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