was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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