I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize