O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Is it because I queefed?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
