Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
