I think I am morally bankrupt
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
