I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
