in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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