her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
