Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
