what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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