I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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