It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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