Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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