ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
