2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I've blown a few things in my day
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
