Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
