you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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