Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
