if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
