brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
