3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
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