And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
im on a boat
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