and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
