I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Randomize
