Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
