she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
