I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
