I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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