...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
