Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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