She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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