no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize