my soul wont recognize me after tonight
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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