Too much gin, very little bucket
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
This is the high leading the old right now
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
