That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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