on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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