Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
He did a backflip because drugs
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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