he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
