Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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