were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Then you guys just all showered together...?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
