No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
