So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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