Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
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