Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
