We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Damn victory sex feels great
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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